Blog
Sporadic posts full of insights, happenings, homework, and the occasional kick in the pants
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What It Means to Feel Your Feelings
Yesterday I was writing about emotional intelligence and the power of therapy for the book and came across this outstanding illustration by Lindsay Braman. (She’s a therapist and artist who has recently moved to St. Louis and she doesn’t know it yet, but we’re gonna be BFFs). In this chart,…
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“Not Quite Fatal”
Not. Quite. Fatal. How’s that for a zing to the heart? Not. Quite. Fatal. That’s a space I lived in for years, thinking it was acceptable, somehow, because I knew it could have been worse, because other people had it worse. And who was I to want better when life…
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New Eyes Come With Time
I’m talking with my daughter when I notice a grimy film over her glasses. It’s so bad I can only assume a giraffe has licked them and then rolled them in the dust bunnies under the couch. “How can you possibly see through these?” I ask. “What?!” she protests. “They’re…
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On Personal Responsibility
In The Luckiest Club, the sobriety support community my friend Laura McKowen started at the beginning of the pandemic and as part of which I host three meetings each week, we are guided by a set of principles that we affectionately call “The Nine Things.” Each one is a powerful…
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Translating the Heart to the Page
In yesterday’s noon TLC meeting, we talked about writing as an instrument of healing in sobriety. By “writing” I don’t mean books or scholarly articles or anthology-ready poems, but rather journal entries, lists – anything that takes the words and feelings out of your head and makes some kind of…
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Blessings for a Friend, a Sister, a Daughter, Myself
The other day I was thinking lovey thoughts about a dear friend and shot her a quick text to say, simply, “I hope you have a day that is good for your heart.” But what I wanted to say was so much deeper. Because I have wishes for her. They’re…
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The Power of Saying Real Things
I got to do something brave today, something I don’t normally do, something that felt good and powerful and alive. I got to speak aloud one of my deepest truths. It’s truth I’m not able to share all that often, in part because it’s not mine alone and in part…
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What Is It Like When Time Stands Still?
You ever look at something so vast, so astounding, so important and beautiful and personal that it feels nearly impossible to attach language? Like, how do you describe the thunderous, awesome sound of waves crashing the beach when you’re the only one there? How do you describe first sight of…
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Walking Through the Fires of Other People’s Disappointment
There’s a fear I hear whispered a lot, whether the topic is changing jobs or shifting the dynamics of a relationship or undertaking sobriety – anything that threatens the status quo, really. It goes something like this: “I’m afraid that if I do _______, then they’re gonna _______.” If I…

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A sporadic love letter from me to you with insights, happenings, homework, and the occasional kick in the pants.
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