I’m Becky.
Advocate for empowerment, choice, mental health and wellbeing; longtime yoga student and teacher; proud corporate dropout; sober mama raising four teenagers.
I’m a pet lover, book hoarder, plant tender, change seeker, curator of things that smell good. Enneagram 8, anti-small talk, pro-hygge, big hugger. Midwest-born and raised. Mediocre cook, terrible (but enthusiastic!) tap dancer,
50 years old and forever figuring life out.
Mostly, though, I’m a meat-coated skeleton made of stardust – and I believe you are, too.
If there’s a question that stumps me, it’s: “What do you do for a living?” The answer was much easier in the old days when I worked in newspapers, political campaigns, and PR.
If you want an “elevator pitch,” I’ll tell you I’m an empowerment writer, teacher, and speaker, and founder of You Are Not Stuck®.
But that’s starting pretty far into the story. That’s the how I do what I do.
What lives beneath is the what, which is the way I describe my actual work: helping people identify and create the life that is calling to them.
In that way, I’m a soul whisperer. A dream doula. A change catalyst. I’m a guide into the questions for which only you have answers. Poet David Whyte refers to these inquiries as “questions that can make or unmake a life… questions that have no right to go away.” I see the divine badass in you, charm it out, and cheer it on.
The most important part of the story, though, is the why. Why is this work of empowerment what I’m called to do? The answer to that is simple:
I’ve lived a life that looked good on the outside but felt horrible on the inside.
I’ve lived a life that I didn’t feel authorized to change.
I’ve lived a life that I felt hopelessly stuck… and once I found freedom, I made it my mission to help others find it, too.
Please know this: You are not intended to spend this life squeezed and choked and squashed in a vise of Other People’s design, or values that aren’t your own, or an outdated world view; no, you were made for discernment, cultivation, and expansion.
Lines are not meant to be toed, they are meant to be moved and redrawn and colored in and erased until they suit you—and you can do that as many times as you like.
They’re your lines, after all.
Becky is no-bullshit real. She’s got an energy and warmth that’s born from her unique and relentless optimism. Yes, she’s a cheerleader. She’s a whip-cracker, too.
Scott Stabile
Author of Big Love
Becky combines deep caring with a kick-ass attitude (and humor!) to help you break the cycle, form new habits, and find a new — healthier and happier — path for your life.
Amy Calvin
Executive Coach
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A sporadic love letter from me to you with insights, happenings, homework, and the occasional kick in the pants.
Newsletter
I don't know about you, but I've had a complicated relationship with work – at least I did before I traded power heels for yoga pants back in 2013.
I was someone who was incredibly proud of my career, perhaps past the point of vanity. I worked first as a newspaper journalist, later as a political campaign manager and, lastly, as a public relations/public affairs practitioner.
Those 20 years gave me so much: Knowledge. Experience. Access to decision-makers and the ability to influence them. A craft that was somehow unique yet offered remarkably transferable skills. Belonging. Identity. Financial security and a comfortable lifestyle.
After my first daughter arrived, and even more after my second, that career became less a source of happiness and more a wedge that separated me from my Self. Every day, I armored up for yet another unwinnable inner battle and asked: Who am I going to disappoint today? Which of these things that I value must suffer the consequence of being spread too thin?
Knowing I couldn't possibly serve them all, would I prioritize my daughters? My husband? Bosses? Clients? Colleagues? Friends?
Ultimately, what suffered most was my sanity.
My soul.
Because, hard as I tried, I simply couldn't reconcile having my head and my heart so disconnected.
The gap between who I was and who I so desperately wanted to be was a chasm, and what remained of me in that center space was choking on self-loathing. It didn't matter how much alcohol I threw at it; in fact, that only gave me more to choke on.
So one day I left... and didn't look back.
* * *
Each time I share versions of this story – in front of audiences large and small – I witness others' tears as they recognize within themselves the soul-level disconnection that often shows up at work.
The circumstances may be different, of course, but the pain of feeling out of alignment in such an important aspect of life is unmistakably common.
Perhaps interests have changed or values evolved. Maybe there are unresolvable conflicts with managers, coworkers, leadership.
Questions about purpose and meaning. Ethical concerns and dilemmas. Resentments. Mental or physical health conditions. New or intensified caretaking responsibilities. Compensation issues. Untenable situations of workplace harassment or discrimination or danger.
Maybe you've been working in a J-O-B but believe you have a deeper mission to fulfill. Maybe you have no interest in working in your field of advanced study anymore. Maybe you want to develop new skills in preparation for a second (or third or fourth) act. Maybe you want to work in a different part of the world. Maybe you won the lottery and don't need to work anymore but aren't quite ready to retire. Maybe other people in your life rely on your paycheck but don't really care whether you're fulfilled.
Maybe you feel like you're suffocating.
Maybe you're
Just.
Fucking.
Bored.
* * *
If you are feeling the pull to re-examine the relationship with your work/career, I want to invite you to retreats I'm co-hosting this summer with Michael Wilson of Joyful Gravity.
The first is in northern California in June, followed by Kripalu in August. East Coast/West Coast, we've got you covered!
Let me tell you a little about Michael if you don't know him already...
After many years in high-dollar tech sales, Michael listened to the voice within and followed all the places his heart was calling: yoga, sobriety, coaching, sound healing, meditation. His knowledge is extensive and his energy is exquisite. It takes only a moment in his presence to feel his genuineness and contagious joy, and there is no one I'd rather talk with about how best to align our work with our deepest selves.
So! Please consider this your invitation to join us this summer, whether in California or Massachusetts. Registration for June is open now; August will soon follow. We would love to see you there! ... See MoreSee Less
Women. Feminism. Black. Race/Racism. Sexuality. Disability. Trauma. Mental health. Climate science. Hate speech. Social justice.
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Absolute. Fucking. Insanity.
Who made him hate so much?
via The New York Times ... See MoreSee Less
Walter White’s first week out of the shelter and into his forever HOME 🥰 ... See MoreSee Less